Only Yours and companion piece Only Mine
by KC-Ket
Summary: 1. Alex waits for Olivia. 2. Olivia thinks of Alex.
1. Only Yours

**Name:** KC

**Title:** Only Yours

**Disclaimer:** Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and all its characters are property of NBC and Dick Wolf. They are not mine and never will be.

**Fandom:** Law & Order: SVU

**Pairing:** Olivia/Alex

**Rating:** PG-15

**Summary:** Alex waits for Olivia.

**Spoiler or Other Information:** - Companion piece to 'Only Mine'.

**Author's Notes:** Wow, a third one for me. I feel special. I thought of obsession at first, the way it eats us from the inside, they way it can burn so brightly into something visible. I hope you enjoy it. All feedback, bar flames, is welcome.

**Only Yours**

I'm yours. Only yours. I have been since the day I first saw you. We talked in such a way that I was mesmerized and I couldn't help but fall for you. You listened to me. I think that's what drew me to you in the first place. No one had _really_ listened to me for so long. It was quite refreshing actually. And your smile. Oh my god, your smile. If I had to describe what your smile does to me… I wouldn't now how. I think that it's like this beam of happiness that you shine in my direction. You smile, I smile.

I love to gaze into your eyes. They are such a deep brown that it feels like I'm falling into them, yet being surrounded and held safely all at the same time. No one has ever had that effect on me before. It feels strange, but I like it. I like you. I would be perfectly happy to live out the rest of my life looking into your eyes, perfectly content.

I saved myself for you. I would wait by your side, by the phone, by your present location. I'd just wait, till I was called. And when I wasn't called… I still wait, right now, this very second. It might seem like I'm busy, like I have other things, but I don't. I'm waiting for you. I know I shouldn't. I know I should move on, live my life content as friends. I have for some time now, and I probably will for some time more. But one day it will get too much.

Salvation is what I live for now. Salvation from the torment you put me through when we're together. I wish I could survive forever, have you in my life, but the burden of my love for you is getting too much to bear.

So here I am, standing at your door. Once again, I might add. I've been waiting here for an hour and 23, wait, 24 minutes. I thought you would have been home by now. Obviously you worked back a bit. Oh well, I'll wait till you get home, no matter what time it is. I'm getting tired of standing here. I'm used to standing but this is tiring me, this waiting.

I decide to sit down with my back to your door. It's comfortable enough for the time being. If I knew what was good for me, for you, I would leave, right now, just get up and leave. But I'm too fare gone for logical thoughts. I have to talk to you. I have to confess.

I hear footsteps up the stairway down the hall a bit and realize that I had drifted off to sleep. I stand up and check my watch. I'd been here 4 hours. Shit. I didn't want to do that, look desperate… but I was, and I knew it.

* * *

"Alex, what are you doing here?" Olivia asked, surprised but pleased to see the ADA waiting by her door.

"I have to tell you something. Can we go inside?" Alex was anxious. She now wished she had stopped by the pub before heading over.

"Sure. Is everything ok?" Olivia moved to open the door.

"Yes. Well, no, not really." Alex was starting to panic. Maybe she had made the wrong decision, maybe this wasn't the time.

As they entered Olivia's apartment Alex looked around as she always did, taking in the residence of the woman she loved. While Alex was momentarily preoccupied Olivia saw Alex's crumpled jacket. _Had she been waiting long? Possibly sitting?_

"So, what's up?"

Alex froze. "Ah… the sky?"

"Alleexx?"

_Ok, here goes_, Alex thought. "I…ah…"

Alex sighed in defeat. She just couldn't bring herself to say the words that had been burning to escape for so long now, three simple words that would change everything, probably for the worst.

Olivia could tell Alex was battling a conflict inside. She walked over to the silent attorney and laid her right hand on Alex's upper left arm. Alex relaxed and Olivia was glad she could help a bit, till she tensed again anyway.

"It's ok Alex, you can tell me." Olivia bore those brown eyes into Alex's blue ones as if trying to pry the words from her.

"I… I love how you've moved the couch." _Chicken_, Alex cursed herself.

"That's not what you were going to say." Olivia held Alex's other arm now, stroking it absentmindedly. The sensation distracted Alex and she looked down just to make sure it was real.

"Sorry." Olivia stepped back.

Alex stepped forward. "It's ok. I liked it."

Olivia's brow creased. "You liked it?"

Alex nodded shyly.

This time Olivia took Alex's hands in her own, holding them gently. She wasn't sure if Alex liked this too, but it was worth a try. "What were you going to say?"

Those brown eyes broke Alex's barrier. "I love you."

Shock was the first thing Olivia felt, followed by relief, hope, happiness, desire and anxiety. It was her turn to confess. She had never been one for showing her emotions through words, so she did what she _hoped_ she did best. Olivia leaned forward and pressed her lips to Alex's. They were just as Olivia imagined, soft.

Alex couldn't believe this was happening. Olivia Benson was kissing her, _her_ of all people. Yes, she had dreamt of this for so long, but now it was actually happening. She just couldn't believe it.

Olivia pulled away and looked into Alex's bright blue eyes. "I love you, too."

* * *

I'm glad I waited. I'm glad I stayed by your door for 4 hours waiting for your return home. It was almost magical, the way you touched me that night, the way we knew exactly what the other wanted, how the other wanted, why the other wanted. It was like we were meant to be, we _are_ meant to be. The next morning was just as good as the night before. Waking up next to you was one of the best things I have ever experienced. Yours arms wrapped around me felt so right, like it is where I belong. I know why this is, it's simple. I'm yours. Only yours.


	2. Only Mine

**Name:** KC

**Title:** Only Mine

**Disclaimer:** Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and all its characters are property of NBC and Dick Wolf. They are not mine and never will be.

**Fandom:** Law & Order: SVU

**Pairing:** Olivia/Alex

**Rating:** PG-13

**Summary:** Olivia thinks of Alex. This is partner to "Only Yours" but you don't need to read it before this one. A scene is repeated but it has been altered quite a bit so please read it.

**Spoiler or Other Information:** - Companion piece to 'Only Yours'.

**Author's Notes:** I was looking at someone when this came to me. The start of it anyway. I just thought about what Olivia could be thinking when she saw Alex. Then I decided that this could mirror "Only Yours". I really hope you enjoy the alternate version. All feedback, bar flames, is welcome.

**Only Mine**

I wish you were mine. Only mine. Oh, to be able to go talk to you, not about work but something, _anything_, personal. I'd like to know if you like opera, chocolate, late night movies, 2 sugars in your coffee. I want to know everything about you.

I'm sitting here on my couch, holding my knees to my chest, shaking. I've been watching you on the news, making your statement to the press. I wish you were here, I wish I could hold you. I would hold your waist and pull you close, kissing your neck. Holding you is what I long for. To be able to wrap my arms around you would be the greatest privilege of all, the greatest honour.

Your skin torments me. I just want to reach into the screen and cup your cheek. Sometimes I swear you like teasing me, that you like me craving you, craving your glance, your perfume, your presence.

I can see your neck. How I long to kiss it. I wish I was there with you, so when you went back inside the courthouse I would follow you and we would sit in your office and talk. You look into the camera and I see your eyes. Wow, those eyes. Even through the camera your eyes drill into me, seeing me. It's like you're looking into my soul.

I wish I could walk up to you and say "What do you want for dinner tonight Alex?" and for you to say "I don't mind. Everything you make is lovely Liv." The nights would be spent talking, laughing and just relaxing. It would be wonderful.

I should ring you after you get off, ask you to dinner. A dinner to celebrate victory in court of course, no hidden motives. Well, not many… I wonder if you'll say yes. I hope you do. We could go to… Huh? My cell's ringing. It must be Elliot.

"Benson." I answer.

"Liv, Cragen want to see us in his office. A new case has come up and he wants us to look over it. He's being very hush hush about this one." Elliot says on the other end. He must be still at work. That guy really likes to get all his paperwork done for the weekend.

"Alright. I'll be there soon. Bye Elliot."

"Bye Liv." I hung up the phone. Great, now I can't ring Alex.

* * *

6 and a half hours later Olivia was walking back up the last flight of stairs to her apartment. She reached her floor and pushed the door open. She saw the woman she had been thinking about the _whole_ time she was gone.

"Alex, what are you doing here?" Olivia asked, surprised but very pleased to see the ADA waiting by her door.

"I have to tell you something. Can we go inside?" Alex was anxious. She now wished she had stopped by the pub before heading over.

"Sure. Is everything ok?" Olivia moved to open the door. She could tell there was something wrong with Alex. She should be happy; she had just won a case.

"Yes. Well, no, not really." Alex was starting to panic. Maybe she had made the wrong decision, maybe this wasn't the time. Olivia was concerned.

As they entered Olivia's apartment Alex looked around as she always did, taking in the reasonably small residence. While Alex was momentarily preoccupied Olivia saw Alex's crumpled jacket. _Had she been waiting long? Possibly sitting?_

"So, what's up?"

Alex froze. "Ah… the sky?"

"Alleexx?" Olivia got extra worried when Alex made jokes to a serious situation. It meant something was _seriously_ wrong.

_Ok, here goes_, Alex thought. "I…ah…"

Alex sighed in defeat. Olivia wondered why Alex was having so much trouble saying whatever it was. Although they weren't overly close friends, they were friends none the less. Olivia wanted it to be more but she always seems to take her time when it comes to relationships.

She could tell Alex was battling a conflict inside. She walked over to the silent attorney and laid her right hand on Alex's upper left arm. Alex relaxed and Olivia was glad she could help a bit, till she tensed again anyway.

"It's ok Alex, you can tell me." Olivia bore those brown eyes into Alex's blue ones as if trying to pry the words from her.

"I… I love how you've moved the couch."

"That's not what you were going to say." Olivia held Alex's other arm now, stroking it absentmindedly. Alex and she looked down at her hand and Olivia suddenly become conscious of what she was doing.

"Sorry." Olivia stepped back.

Alex stepped forward. "It's ok. I liked it."

Olivia's brow creased, confused. "You liked it?"

Alex nodded shyly.

This time Olivia took Alex's hands in her own, holding them gently. She wasn't sure if Alex liked this too, but it was worth a try. "What were you going to say?"

Olivia tried to look as open and supportive as she could. Obviously it worked because Alex finally spoke. "I love you."

Shock was the first thing Olivia felt, followed by relief, hope, happiness, desire and anxiety. It was her turn to confess. She had never been one for showing her emotions through words, so she did what she _hoped_ she did best. Olivia leaned forward and pressed her lips to Alex's. They were just as Olivia imagined, soft.

Alex couldn't believe this was happening. Olivia Benson was kissing her, _her_ of all people. Yes, she had dreamt of this for so long, but now it was actually happening. She just couldn't believe it.

Olivia pulled away and looked into Alex's bright blue eyes. "I love you, too."

* * *

Wow, that was one hell of a night! It was the best night in my entire life! The way we opened up to one another in the most intimate way was almost magical. We didn't even have to say a word; we just knew how to be together. I've never been one to enjoy sharing a bed with someone, but somehow we just fit together. We would both move in a semi-conscious state so that one of us was holding the other. You rolled, I rolled. I rolled, you rolled. I think I know why we did this, why we are _obviously_ meant to be, why we just fit together so well. It is because I'm yours and you're mine. Only mine.


End file.
